I could affectionately (or not so affectionately) be called a momma bear. My generally calm demeanor can quickly change if a loved one is threatened. I instinctively want to protect them from harm. I’ve read stories of women lifting cars off the ground when their child is trapped under it. We guard the physical and emotional space of those we care about, but who is protecting us? Self-protection frequently takes a back seat to “life’s “things. But it should be one of our number one priorities. Otherwise the message we send is we are not worth it. Whatever time, attention, love and protection we give our loved ones we should equally (if not more) give to ourselves. If we don’t then who will?
So, what do we protect? How do we get vigilant about keeping the things in our “safe” protected, while being open to new challenges and relationships? You must hold sacred those things you’ve achieved in life. How do we identify and guard those things? The answer is different for everyone. Here are a few ideas to get you started.
Self-esteem is not a given; it is acquired.
Sometimes we wreak havoc on our self-esteem without realizing it. We must recognize our needs and meet them. We can’t keep ourselves on the back burner to satisfy the needs of others. If we don’t satisfy ourselves, we probably do a bad job of satisfying others. Expressing your frustration or dissatisfaction with someone doesn’t make you an awful human being. You must place value on all of your feelings, not just those that people find easy to accept.
Our values must be protected because they should govern our actions. A strong core value system keeps you from wasting energy second guessing yourself. When we listen to our hearts and live by our beliefs, life gets easy. Our life, and our actions, are clear for everyone to see, and we don’t worry about hiding anything. Your values are not things that should show up when it’s convenient; you should live by them all the time. This includes all the choices you make, not just the big ones. You can’t protect your values if you don’t know what you believe in. So, start by identifying your ante to play. These are the values that no matter what the consequence, you will not compromise on.
Our dreams can’t rely on the approval of others. Why should our best life be determined by someone else? We can protect our motivation by staying close to the things we value the most. Creating a vision board or journal to write down our hearts desires keeps us in touch with our purpose.
Every hair on your head is original, no one like you exists in the world. So be you authentically! Our authentic self is who we are when we take away the labels and judgments we have given ourselves. It is who we are without the veil. Everything else is just a façade.
Think about the child in you. Early on, before we learned about societies expectations we just felt free. We would run through the sprinklers in our front yards not giving a thought to how it might mess up our hair, or if we looked fat in our swimsuits. Channel that inner child. Don’t hide your authentic self, the universe needs you.
Protecting yourself, those things that make you – you, helps keep us on the path to our best life. Don’t feel bad about worrying about yourself you deserve the energy and motivation self-protection provides.
You were born an original, don’t die a copy!